Recovery Nation

I tried to search the forums to see if anyone had discussed this before, but to no avail.

Since discovery I have started experiencing some very intense pain throughout my body - neck, shoulder, back, hips, elbows, hands, etc. I had some of this pain before discovery (mostly just the shoulder), but it has gotten much worse to a point that it is now almost unbearable (and I am 32 yo). I kind of feel like I'm dying - like my body is failing me.

I am seeing a doctor and so far no blood results are conclusive - no evidence of arthritis or auto-immune disease. I understand that sometimes our emotional state can have a real impact on our physical state, and I guess I was just wondering if anyone else has gone through this? It seems so cruel to be dealing with physical pain on top of everything else, and I just want to know if I am alone in this. And I guess I am also trying to figure out how vigorously I should look for the physical cause of my issues, or whether I should accept that it is probably just emotional and concentrate on dealing with that part.

Part of me is also worried that the pain is my body's way of telling me "get out!" and that's not the message I am ready to hear yet.

Hi PushingForward,

I have not experienced this, however, everyone is different.

Have you attempted any relaxation techniques? Meditation? I have a friend who, out of sheer desperation with overall pain, tried acupuncture and it worked wonders for her. (And she is a firm believer in conventional, western medicine. Acupuncture was really a final choice for her.)

I hope you work this out. I can't imagine physical pain on top of emotional pain.

F

Funny you should mention this. I haven't been on here for a while and this was the first post I read. I have been having a lot of pain that started in my neck/shoulder. It seems to be moving on to more places now. I just generally feel like everything is too heavy and I get throbbing pain at times. I was just reading about the symptoms of lupus and wondering if I should ask to get checked for it.
I was told I have very low vitamin D and that some people report feeling better after they begin taking a large amount of the supplement regularly.
Let me know if you find anything out about it, sorry I can't help anymore than that.

When I am deeply distressed, I always get severe body pain. I thought it was normal. It first happened to me over thirty years ago, when my father died. At that time, I got such crushing pains in my chest that on one occasion, I almost fainted while driving and just had to apply the brakes in the middle of the highway and not move until the pain passed. I remember the waves of pain were so great, it even affected my vision!

For about two years after his death, I remember thinking that, if I had a heart attack, I wouldn't recognize the symptoms because I was so used to chest pain as a feature of my daily life. I experienced a return of this pain when my oldest daughter died and also when I lost another girl, who passed away in utero a few weeks before she was due to be born.

At one time, I wondered if feeling that level of physical pain meant that my body would eventually succumb and develop some serious, chronic complaint! At times, the pain can be so great, it really does feel like you could die. It can be extraordinary. But fortunately, I have developed no long term problems at all.

After dday, I experienced chest pain and also severe neck and shoulder pain for many months. I am so used to physical pain as an accompaniment to emotional trauma, that it doesn't surprise me when it happens and I tend to accept it as part of the parcel. It is fascinating that emotional trauma should bring with it this visceral element but for many of us, it does.

Our dday was in January, 2010 and my Mum passed away at the end of August last year. The physical aspects of the pain from both these events has mostly abated for me now. I suspect the neck and shoulder pain is the result of unconsciously tensed muscles that eventually tire and reward us with long term pain! I have no theories as to why the crushing chest pain.

If you're concerned, of course go to the doctor and have a bit of a check up. For my part, I've come to recognize it as part of the process and apart from being kind to myself and maybe getting the odd massage and adjusting my sleeping arrangements (I find sleeping flat on my back and ditching the pillow helps a bit), time and the settling down of my emotions eventually sorts it.

Be good to yourself, go to a sympathetic, supportive health practitioner that you trust and get checked out if you have worries. If you are like me and get this as part of the process, it is impossible to tell the difference between emotional pain that manifests in the body and pain that is the result of physical issues that need medical attention. I can reassure you that any of the pain that is the result of an emotional response will pass although it can take a couple of years. Take care.

I'm a physiotherapist who deals with a lot of chronic pain and I am still amazed by the ways in which that mental distress and abuse can manifest themselves in the body. Of course, get yourself checked out medically but when everything suddenly starts at once (rather than building up gradually), it's unlikely to be a physiological problem. Acupuncture and relaxation (yoga, pilates, meditation - whatever works for you) would be my recommendations.

Good luck.

I can relate to all of the above. Through my forties I've always been athletic, competitive and in very good condition. When all of this started (DDays, etc.) about 6 years ago I began having all sorts of symptoms. Pain in the neck, back, chest. Irregular heartbeat and angina. Dizzy spells. I also had blood tests, MRIs on my brain, ect. to find out what was wrong but they found nothing. Through it all I still exercised and was in pretty good shape but when the symptoms appeared I would would have the fear and feeling that I was going to have a heart attack or was dying or that something was seriously wrong. My doctor, who was aware of my personal situation, eventually convinced me that nothing was wrong and that the "roving symptoms" could be attributed to stress. I looked into that and as I researched it I came to the same realization. My personal situation hasn't gotten any easier and sometimes the symptoms show up, but now I try to remind myself that I am healthy and that this too shall pass - and it always has. I guess if it doesn't and I keel over then...well.... I won't have to worry about it any more! Hang in there!

Personally I believe that the mind/body connection can be very strong and there has been a lot of research on it. We all carry stress in different ways. I have carried stress in my back, shoulders, and stomach. There are some great books out there that deal with this topic. A search might lead you to a book that would be helpful to you, using some key words such as: Mind/body connection; Stress and physical pain; etc. Pain can signal a warning that could beg finding whatever the underlying cause. One doctor told me that the adrenaline is released by the body as a response to fear and other stressors. As the adrenaline accumulates in the body and is not released or broken down (which can be accomplished by aerobic activity), it causes pain and the pain is very real. Does that make sense in your case? When I was in the thick of stress and felt it in my body, I went to the gym every day. That helped a lot. Others seem to find relief in yoga, meditation, walks in nature, and other things.

Wishing you the best of luck! Keep us posted on what works for you

Wow. This has been so helpful to hear other people's stories around this.

Mirette - I do truly believe that our emotional state can have true physical manifestations. For me, however, meditation, gym, and yoga (all of which I have tried a lot of lately) have not seemed to be the key for me. However, I do definitely carry a high level of anxiety and maybe I just have not yet found the right way to handle it for myself. I am now trying a daily walk on the beach, as that is something that I truly look forward to, so we will see if that helps! I just got back from one, actually, and my body is aching unfortunately.

aboutthetime- Wow. That sounds so much like what I am going through. I am so sorry that you have had to suffer through it too. I don't know if it's worse to just be in that much pain all the time (with no relief), or the feeling of not being able to do all of the things you used to do. I long to run and hike - I used to climb mountains! - but now even a walk is difficult. Just so you know, my doctor has diagnosed me with Hypermobility Syndrome (or Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome). I am shocked by how many of the symptoms fit my case - TMJ, difficulty sleeping, popping joints, headaches, sore neck, clumsiness, etc. It can also cause heart issues, asthma issues, so many things. Anyway, it's worth looking into if you have issues with pain. It can also give you no problems your whole life, and then manifest badly during periods of extreme emotional or physical stress (there you go). Most doctors don't know much about it. There's a great forum for it: The Hypermobility Syndrome Association - Forums
www.hypermobility.org/forums.php I'm not 100% convinced yet that this is what is going on, but it does seem likely.

runningscared - Thanks for the input of a physiotherapist! My therapist is versed in psychosomatic pain and is going to be going over the places that I have pain to try to determine the emotions behind them. She thinks that as we work on those emotions, the pain should dissipate. Fingers crossed. Meanwhile, thanks for the suggestions of acupuncture. I do think I should try that (I have in the past, but not recently).

andromache - Wow again. So interesting to hear how common this is, and how extreme it can be. If it was less extreme, it would be easier to believe, but I really feel like my body is falling apart, but all my blood tests show a completely healthy girl! It is incredibly heartening to think that it will go away though. I think it is the fear of living like this forever that is too much to bear. I'm almost done with the doctors (rheumatologist next) then I will just concentrate on being as emotionally healthy as I can be, and hope that my body follows suit.
Also, I am so sorry for all of your losses. You have been through so much...

inHisstrength - Yes, I think it is worth getting everything checked out just to rule things out - fybromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, lupus, MS, and now Hypermobility Syndrome. I would get checked for all of those things. And if they are negative, then just try to take care of your heart :)

Frost - Your sympathy is so sweet. I feel like I'm getting the acupuncture message from all sides, so that must be a sign. I feel like I have tried so many things and nothing has helped substantially, but that is no reason to give up. I think my next step will be chiro and acupuncture. I'll let you know how it goes.

Thank you everyone for your thoughts - it really has helped me feel less freaked out. I'm also getting a new natural latex bed that is supposed to be great for body pains, so I will let you know if that helps!

Hi Pushing forward.

I get severe body pain in times of stress or depression as well. My doctor sent me to a massage therapist who worked wonders! She also taught me about facial massage (don't mean face...mean skin!). Basically when we hold tension in our muscles, they can begin to stick to the inside of our facial (skin). So if you massage your skin in a way that is trying to move your skin, and not your muscles you help separate any stiff tissue. It may sound strange, but it works wonders. It should be done on a regular basis...and you can really tell the difference in pain level.

_________________
Shine On

I am a massage therapist and I aprove ^^^this message (ha-ha)
I also suffer pain that is sometimes totally debilitating. I have collapsed when trying to stand up after a particular episode.

Armoring. We try to protect ourselves by holding what we have so very tight. I also practice acupressure both on myself and my clients and it is so very helpful and appropriate for chronic and emotional pain. Jin Shin Do is a form of acupressure developed by a therapist. We are also trained in some very basic forms of counseling geared towards trauma and abuse.

And I still have found myself in now two abusive relationships with addicts of one kind or another - go figure.............

Hi,

I was just about to post the same as 'seethesky' posted It's a fact that we do try to hide our emotions and stop our body from expressing that emotion. I believe that sometimes, we tense those areas that would otherwise allow us to express the pain we feel in the usual physical ways. The aching muscles I believe are used to hold back the expressive behaviour. This might be all rubbish but its what I believe. I have been in Reiki sessions before now and my lower abdomen tends to hold a lot of aching which I believe stops me crying. In session, the practitioner relaxes that area and I have been known to cry. Happens with other areas too. I don't feel the need nowadays for lots of therapy to help me through my pain from the impact of porn addiction (PS) but I went regularly at one time.

So, how about trying some massage or Reiki or any other body therapy that might help relax your mind, your body and your soul for just a little while. Even a short release can help.

When is the last time you cried or punched a pillow in anger ...? Guess what I'm asking is whether you feel you are holding in your feelings and emotions ... ?

Authona xxx

A

I just wanted to add my agreement to all the comments here. I get terrible neck pain whenever I'm stressed, and in the last 15 years (all the years dealing with multiple D-Days and years into recovery), it's been chronic. I see a chiropractor who has really helped me. I almost became addicted to pain pills early in D-Day years, and fortunately realized the danger in relying on those. It's so tempting because it dulls emotional pain, too, so I really have to be honest with myself and not request those prescriptions.

Mari

If you can find someone that does myofascial release, it is wonderful. Coach Mel already talked about this, but I am currently seeing a physiotherapist for a knee injury, but the first thing he did was talk about myofascial release. I had experienced this therapy in Sedona one time for my fibromyalgia and have been trying to find someone in my area that understood it ever since. The physiotherapist doesn't know any details about what I'm going through but he does know that I have experienced a great deal of loss and trauma. He used the analogy that my body was like a grand hotel and over the years I had closed the curtains and locked the doors on a lot of rooms and wings; he is hoping to help me reopen these rooms again, throw back the curtains and open the windows to let the light and the air inside. Thought this was a great analogy. Oh boy, I think we all need this at RN.

Interesting session yesterday. He told me that there was a great deal of movement in my fascia; he said it was like I was taking back territory that had once belonged to me and now I was moving the lines forward! I am also in EMDR counseling for trauma and my counselor told me a couple of weeks ago that I need to take back everything that had once belonged to me...from geographical places to my rights as a wife, etc, etc. These two people do not know each other and I thought it was quite amazing they were both on the same page.

Check out fascia on the internet. The simplest way to describe it is this: you know the thin milky, blue film on a chicken breast? That is the fascia and we have it throughout our body. This fascia can become constricted and needs to be released. It is hard to find someone who understands the concept but I think it is becoming more popular.

I think that our body, minds and spirits are all connected and when one part of us is out of sync the rest suffers. I'm not a far-out person but I think we need both our western medicine and alternative treatments. It does seem that the two factions are working together more but there is a long road ahead.

Wishing you peace and contentment,
Hollyhock

I agree Hollyhock.

I am in physical therapy for a leg injury that, because I did not seek help early on, became more severe and eventually injured other muscles in the same leg. Among other treatments, the therapist is using myofacial release and it is doing wonders.

What’s interesting is that I was just reading in a Reiki book this morning, about same thing – the mind, body, soul connection. Although I have always believed in the connection, I never thought about what you shared in regards to holding trauma in our bodies.

Thank you for posting this and I will talk to my therapist about this next week!

Hugs –
itfm

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"The past has no power to stop you from being present now. Only your grievance about the past can do that. And what is a grievance? The baggage of old thought and emotion." - Eckhart Tolle A New Earth