What is it?
Consider a woman who remains celibate until her wedding night, then sleeps with ten men in the first year of her marriage. Or the husband who, after seven years of faithfulness, begins a string of sexual encounters with other men in the local park. Or a young girl who sleeps with over thirty boys before she even graduates from high school. All of these behaviors are considered to be promiscuous. In the context of this workshop, promiscuity will be considered any sexual activity that involves another human being and resembles any of the behavioral patterns described below.
Promiscuity is one of the more dangerous and life-altering behaviors associated with the sex and love addictions, because the consequences are often extreme: pregnancy, abortions, AIDS, murder, rape. Few men can forgive themselves for passing on an STD to their faithful wife. Few women can ever let go of the lifelong guilt that comes from having an abortion, or from giving up their children for adoption. Other consequences of promiscuous behavior include STD's, getting robbed, blackmailed and more. Even when such consequences are never realized, those engaging in promiscuous behavior must still deal with the emotional drain that comes from maintaining numerous relationships, worrying about possible consequences, guilt/shame (when infidelity is involved), etc.
Promiscuity plays an important role in people's lives...most commonly, it allows those with a low self-esteem, or those who have been emotionally neglected to feel like they are needed, desired, useful. For others, it allows them to relive past abuse situations and still others, promiscuity fulfills nothing more than a masturbatory-like sexual release.
Common Behaviors Associated with Promiscuity:
Elements Frequently Associated with Promiscuity (from the Wheel of Sexual Compulsion):
Other Behaviors Commonly Found in a Ritualistic Chain where Promiscuity is the Primary Behavior:
Frequent Cues/Triggers Often Associated With Promiscuity
Boundaries Frequently Violated By Promiscuity:
If you have experienced similar behavior as described above (or have experienced additional behaviors that were not mentioned, but fall under the category of Promiscuity), please include them in your responses below.
My History with Promiscuity
Describe your history involving promiscuity. For this exercise, include not only sexual encounters that involve direct physical contact, but also those behaviors that include sexual contact with others involving other communication devices (e.g. e-mail, phone calls, chat rooms, etc.)
Think for a few minutes, then list your most common triggers for these types of behaviors:
List any concerns, unusual circumstances or uncertainties that you currently have regarding any of these behaviors.
