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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2020 10:23 am 
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Joined: Tue Sep 03, 2019 1:59 am
Posts: 10
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Last edited by ltr17 on Fri Jul 10, 2020 2:50 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2020 10:43 pm 
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Joined: Sat Feb 17, 2018 11:00 pm
Posts: 27
Hey ltr17,

I think I have struggled with something similar. For me there's a cycle; some days I am able to do everything I have planned, I make time for recovery work, I feel accomplished for what I have done in the day, and motivated to finish the things I didn't tomorrow. Other days I feel hopeless; I don't believe anything will change, I don't do much of anything and I feel guilty for it but still can't find the motivation to do any more, I want to escape.

I don't have the answers but here are some things I have been working on. Maybe you will gain some insight.

When you are used to acting on every compulsion you have as soon as you feel uncomfortable you lose any sense of delayed gratification; you have no patience. I often find myself putting very little effort into something for a very short period of time before deciding it doesn't work and giving up. You have to train yourself to have more self discipline. Sometimes you have to just do what needs to be done even when you don't feel like it, even if you think it's stupid, or hard, or it won't work. Remind yourself that you are an independent, autonomous, adult and just do it.

State management:
Start paying attention to the state you are in, excited, anxious, tired, energetic, etc., and have a goal state. Start thinking about the things that you do now to manage your state, eat when hungry, listen to a song when you want to feel a way, etc., and what actions you could take to get to your goal state.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Just some ideas
Good luck,
Wolf.


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 06, 2020 3:53 am 
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Joined: Tue Sep 03, 2019 1:59 am
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Last edited by ltr17 on Fri Jul 10, 2020 2:50 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 06, 2020 7:12 am 
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Joined: Wed Nov 14, 2018 2:39 am
Posts: 272
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Probably a very rookie question, but how do you guys derive stimulation from your goals, values?
Are there any optimal or efficient ways to reach substantial emotional stabilization from your goals and values?
Is there a way to also derive stimulation in a more passive way? Perhaps connecting to a universal value to derive some stimulation? If so, how does one do that?


Hi Ltr17

First of all I have worked on forgetting the stimulation I had from my compulsive behaviour, it was maybe ok at the time, but as we all know, was no good in the long run. That may sound like impossible, but it has worked for me.
I have not set goals that would cause me stress if I did not reach them, I made my goals fairly simple and I made quite a few basic ones so that even if I do not achieve them all in one day or one week etc, I will know that I managed in others.
I get a vast amount of stimulation knowing that I am sober and that as each day passes I get even better.
I look for stimulation in the way I am at work, the way I am at home, the way I am with family and friends. Simple things like doing my hobbies, reading even watch a good movie - they all keep me away from any thought of acting out.

_________________
“Change your thoughts, change your life.” ~Lao Tzu
Regards
T


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